Opportunities

 There is nothing as hard to find as an opportunity. You screw things once, and you may just miss an opportunity of a lifetime.  On most occasions, you miss it for good.

My doctor offered me a job. I’m still thinking whether I should take it. I’ll have to go back to school, get a license… a lot of stuff. I have time, unlike several people I know of, unless I kick the bucket. Hehehe … There’s always a silver lining to every cloud.

 Not an IT cloud, but a life cloud. The little joys of life. He’s that awesome. I hope you have such awesome caregivers. No wonder he achieves much. Now, that makes me wonder what I have done!

Now it looks possible. Then it was not looking possible at all.

Looking back, He’s done much more for me than I can tell. I had a reservation, then about something, but I think that thorn is too small to notice now. And my issue was not really with him. I guess I was just miserable and sick and expected perfection from everyone handling me.

My life had stopped; I had to do outrageous things like eating healthy all the time; I was a dependent. And to top it all, I had to bear the stares. Gosh!!! It was just bad!!!

As for eating. I am saying outrageous because I had no appetite for junk. None at all!!! That’s just weird! Once in a while I want to try something junky but then it was almost not possible. No unhealthy snacks. Totally nothing unhealthy. Imagine that’s possible!

Healthy food made me salivate. It was good enough for me. Unhealthy foods did not stir anything in me. But, looking back, I needed to be that way otherwise my pounds would have gone through the roof. Hey, healthy foods also make you grow big. It is good to watch the amounts too.

My learned friend has done everything I want to do. Travel and read. And no, I’m not into him. He’s just a fine example to the likes of me. He’s, so married. I don’t snatch husbands. It’s a rule I live by. With all these singles? No! Keep your man. I don’t want him. It doesn’t cross my mind to want him. God, no!!!

There is no shortage of men. Just gentlemen. Not all men are equal. Gentlemen are rare gems.

But married or not, you can always tell a good guy. It is so hard to hide “good”.

He treats you like a patient not a statistic. He gets you even when you don’t get yourself anymore. He inspires people and tries not to tell you something you won’t like even though you are that.  He slips. It happens or you are too sensitive. I remember I was one big girl. I’ve never been that big! I’m not used to it. If big people feel that way, I never want to be that big ever again!

You know I had to open seams and wear things that can’t fit me now in order to clothe myself? What an experience!!! I still can’t believe that was me.

Now before you call me names, let me say something. Being voluptuous is okay. If you are comfortable, then okay. But I was not myself then, so I hated it. I had big everything; including my cheeks, shoulders, neck and very sharp teeth. Boy, I didn’t know my teeth were that sharp!!! Until I couldn’t chew without chewing the inside part of my own cheeks! God, it was awful. I think that’s the worst part.

But I also hated the part where people have to do things for you because you can’t. It's like a prison. For real!!! If someone does things for you when you can and it’s because of love, that’s something else. You can’t compare sick to love. You just can’t. There is a difference.

I have no weight issues, but I’m not oblivious to those. Anyway, gym for life! My body needs it. I’m no diva. My body can store fat like a nonsense...
But I’m sure the cheek thing doesn’t exist for voluptuous. It’s bad!

Eating food was a nightmare, but then again, I had serious appetite. Very serious appetite.  Funny. Sick people don’t like food, but I discovered you can be sick and really eat! For real!

And people’s comments? You look fat and healthy. Seriously?  Yes, I was fat; but healthy? Really? You blind?

People never believed that I was sick. Okay, just the people around me knew I was unwell. Now they get it that I was seriously sick. My clothes don’t fit me anymore. I should throw them away and get others… I’ll keep my favorites. However small.

I said a fresh start. I meant it.

Anyway, I’m a small girl and soon everything will fit me perfectly.  I am so looking forward to that. Thank God.

I don’t know if everything fits me. I have to try them out to find out.

I can’t wait to start my long safaris. This time, I’ll make them super long!!!

And I think almost everything I could put on when I was sick goes. The nice stuff remains. I have a personal attachment to some things. I’ll let go when I can. Now, I can’t.

Sometimes angels are disguised as humans.

I can't wait for my appointment next month. You'll be shocked this time.